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The Onion: "Fuck Everything"

(3 posts)
  • Started 1 year ago by missing_kskd
  • Latest reply from edust1958

  1. missing_kskd

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    WASHINGTON—Following the fatal shooting this morning at a Connecticut elementary school that left at least 27 dead, including 20 small children, sources across the nation shook their heads, stifled a sob in their voices, and reported fuck everything. Just fuck it all to hell.

    All of it, sources added.

    “I’m sorry, but fuck it, I can’t handle this—I just can’t handle it anymore,” said Deborah McEllis, who added that “no, no, no, no, no, this isn’t happening, this can’t be real.” “Seriously, what the hell is this? What’s even going on anymore? Why do things like this keep happening?”

    Continued McEllis, before covering her face with her hands, “Why?”


    Posted on December 15, 2012 - 08:01 PM #
  2. RadioBuggie

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    Posted on December 15, 2012 - 11:33 PM #
  3. edust1958

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    Actually given what happened, I think the Onion really did the best it could to satirize such awful events. I think that there are days when any or all of us have thought... "FUCK IT ALL"..."put a fork in it, we're done."

    Posted on December 16, 2012 - 08:42 AM #

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